Girls living at the Holy Family Home in the Philippines had big smiles for the camera. Girls who have been abused find new hope at the home run by the Capuchin Tertiary Sisters.

Maria, 15, Isabel, 12, two of six sisters abused by their father, filed a case against him. He bodily injured himself in jail while the case was proceeding, and he died in a hospital in March. The family wouldn’t accept his remains. Maria and Isabel, however, asked to pay their respects. Maria said, “I forgive him and loved him because he was my father.”

Isabel and Maria are among nearly 40 youngsters in the Holy Family Home in Cabug, a barrio in Bacolod City on the Philippines’ island of Negros.

Most of the girls living at the home, ages 9 to early 20s, have been sexually abused by family members, relatives or neighbors. They have been brought to the home, run by the Capuchin Tertiary Sisters of the Holy Family, by local government social workers who then follow up on the children’s court cases. Sisters Alma Alovera, Carol Peji, Adela Paternina, Dora Hernández as well as Amy Tibus, a full-time social worker, keep the home running smoothly.

And it is a home. The girls are very proud of it and show visitors around. They live in two dorms, and each bed of the younger girls has a stuffed animal. A general purpose building, open on one side, serves as dining room and study hall, which is converted into a concert hall when the girls present a program of Filipino and modern dances and songs for special visitors.

On December 26, 2004, the girls traveled three hours to visit Columban Father Michael Doohan, one of their benefactors, in his parish in Cauayan. They put on their program for him and his staff, just to say thank you for their support.

Lives & Hope Restored
Many of the girls have missed out on schooling, but all now attend public elementary and high schools in Cabug. Six attend college in Bacolod and live in a rented house there with a house mother, returning to Holy Family Home on the weekends.

On Palm Sunday this year, I attended the graduation of five, including Maria, from elementary school. Three days later, I was at the high school graduation of three more girls. Most of the girls attended both ceremonies, proud of their companions. These girls have a strong sense of family.

But the lovely smiles on the girls’ faces hide deep suffering. Testifying against a family member is all but impossible for some. Professional counselors regularly meet with the girls individually, and the Sisters help each girl work through the pain of her experiences.

The Sisters are with each girl at least until her court case is finished, which rarely takes less than a year. Because of their situation at home, many stay much longer.
Ruth, for example, has been at the Holy Family Home for about 10 years. Her background is different from most of the other girls. Both her parents were jailed for serious crimes, though not against children.

About four years ago, Ruth disappeared, and the Sisters spent months searching for her. They discovered that she had been taking jobs to help her family. She became very discouraged when she found her mother, now released from jail, living with another man.

The Sisters persuaded Ruth that the future for her and her family depended upon her living in a stable situation and attending school. Since her return, Ruth has been a consistent honors student and will graduate from high school later this year.

Recently Ruth’s two younger sisters, who had spent years in an orphanage run by another religious community, have joined Ruth. This is an example of Holy Family Home’s motto: “A Child Redeemed is a Generation Saved.”

Columban Father Seán Coyle ministers to the girls of the Holy Family Home. First communicants received the Eucharist from Fr. Coyle on the Feast of the Holy Family in December 2003.

Afterward the girls put on a program. One of them, a 10-year-old named Lourdes, sat beside me and asked me not to laugh at her when her turn came to perform. I was struck by the innocence and trust of her request and was to discover that she has a remarkably pure singing voice that would find its natural home in a medieval monastery!

After dinner the Sisters performed traditional dances from Colombia. Two girls put a huge sombrero on my head and made me join, to the great amusement of all.

The girls have made me feel welcome and show me affection. I often bring candy or ice cream, remembering my Uncle Mick, my mother’s brother. Mick, who died shortly after I had entered the seminary, loved to “spoil” his nephews and nieces in a way that my family remembers with great affection.

I minister to the girls as a priest, too. Every three months, there’s a Mass for those whose birthdays have occurred during that quarter. I hear the girls’ confessions on those occasions. Earlier this year, I baptized and confirmed three of the teen-age girls who, along with eight others including Isabel, also made their first Holy Communion.

The girls have also ministered to my faith. When social worker Amy and some of the girls hitched a ride in my car to downtown Bacolod, Ruth led us in prayer for the beginning of a journey.

On another occasion, medical students from Ireland were visiting and brought some snacks, so one girl, without being asked, led us all in a prayer of grace.

The wonderful Capuchin Tertiary Sisters and their charges keep me in touch with my humanity and the Gospel. They have become very much part of my story.

Columban Father Seán Coyle of Ireland is the editor of Misyon, the Columbans’ mission magazine for the Philippines.